Saturday, April 08, 2006

Show #37

We've all done ridiculous things to win the affections of a certain someone we fancy, and on this show we air it out. We titled the segment "The top three stupid things we did to get laid", but in my case, I didn't even score with two out of the three ladies. Here's my abbreviated list.

1) Wrote at least 20 haikus tailored to the conversations I had with a co-worker, slipped them under her office door. Results: nada.
2) Asked a co-worker to teach me how to make pasta and sauce as an excuse to meet her at her apartment for a "cooking lesson". Result: she actually thought I wanted to learn how to cook pasta and shunned my advances. I went home with some cold limp linguini of my own.
3) I sang a Doors song (Love Me Two Times) in a girls ear after trying to get further during a make-out session in suburbia somewhere. This girl had been sort of a groupie to the cover band I was in at the time and once mentioned to me that she thought I looked like Jim Morrison. Result: She loved me once, not twice right there on the lawn.

Jefe, being the suave linguist that he is has a much better record than I, but you'll just have to listen to the show to hear his. Please comment here with your own stupidity of the amorous kind.