Sunday, July 12, 2009

Hairline Fractures

Broke an emotional curfew
got punished all weekend
decided to punish back
blitzkrieg anger attack,
forced repeat no retract
Jeckyl cringes through first act
Hyde expands and contracts...

Reviewed a Wilco show in Delaware
with a photo press pass to boot.
I was taking pictures at Tweedy's feet and the camera battery died after 4 shots.
Had to stand there and fake it while the anger slugged me from the inside out.
My first photo assignment a laugh riot
more riot no laughs.
massive professional gaff.

Saturday, up early, the blood on the rise.
wife wanted healthy breakfast and then exercise
lashed out complaining like a rabid machine
having to watch my son in between.
His whining connects with a cruel little switch
that turns me quick into a psychopathic bitch...
He's three and I'm forty so I'm going to win.
And the rage pins him back to the seat he is in.

Voices raise sharp
filing knives to the tip.
Conversation is shredded
as the sanity slips.

Sunday is a bully that bludgeons my face.
My son wakes me up as the dream was erased.
Had a breakfast of stones
washed it down with some fire
Had to go to a birthday party as I drained all desire
and I cried on the way to a gathering of smiles.
the weather was gorgeous as I gargled my bile.
This is harshest of harsh
I relinquish control
to the elegant demons who shoot you up with vitriol.

Later the chores laid the mines in the yard.
I punched a few doors to remain over-scarred.
I made my son cry and I made my wife run
under bright summer air setting my world to stun.
I ran over a bird on my way to buy beer.
bashed my head on the wheel in disgust and sans steer.
medicated my way to a normal pulse rate
and washed away the weekend so dim and irate.

Some days you come up empty and you wait for the night.
where its closer to sleep and ok to lose sight
lose fight
lose light.

1 comment:

  1. Seano, this is beautifully written but sad to read. I hope you are doing better. Life is never all good, but its never all bad either. You're in my thoughts.